Keep Going

Another day, last few days I’ve been wondering who was in the driving seat. I could hear the voice talking from my head but it didn’t sound like me. I wonder who it was. As the parts are there to protect me, I must have felt under threat in some way. Why? Who knows, or even cares? I was helping someone the other day in a session, and they showed an angry alter personality, I wasn’t sure if it was a demon or an alter. Their life is a bit of a mess and they’re much younger than me. I am sure I’ve been through much more trauma than them but I’ve functioned for 50 years or so. I’m convinced that’s what is important for me right now, the be able to function. At least I can hold down a job. If my superiors found out the truth about me, would they fire me? I wouldn’t be surprised. I am a little afraid of an alter coming out and either doing something crazy, or saying something awful and getting me fired. Some people here were saying the other day how awful I was sounding, but that was in the middle of a time when the real ‘I’ wasn’t in the driving seat. Well, the Lord knows and I know He’ll protect me. I’m so grateful for the job and all it brings me. The truth though is that the Lord is my only hope and supplier, He has allowed me to keep the job He has given me for the moment. I’m making the most of it. I lost count of the number of times when I was a police officer I met with people whose lives had just been irrevocably changed by something out of their control. That’s the way I feel most of the time.